don’t need to know that.
I won’t ask you to tell me
the truth, I’m
too afraid to hear it.I feel the tension rising,
feel each atom of these vibes,
I feel the stupidity of me
wanting to hear lies.
I wait within each silence
To hear my heart beat again.
I try to reach within to find
My courage once again.
But in the strangling silence,
I hear no heartbeat,
In the blinding darkness,
I cannot find my feet.
I’m lost in you and all you say,
Your complex web of clever wordplay,
And on the stone-cold ground I lay,
Waiting for the light of day.
You’ve trapped me in this maze
you called
your love- and in my daze
I bought
your story,
thought
my worries
had no grounds for existence.
But once again I fooled myself-
My instinct saw this coming,
For while I knew what all this meant,
I hoped that somehow wanting
something badly enough
to be true,
would change that evil man
in you,
But somewhere in my heart
I knew…
I wait again,
To hear it beat again,
and then-
discover too,
my breath was held
waiting for you,
Inhale-exhale- I cannot do
My senses are numbed,
all on account
of you.
I fight to escape this coma,
As inside I face the truth,
you viper! Viscious killer,
I know exactly what you do,
If I don’t leave now i’ll soon be dead,
for now I realise,
like poison you get into my head
and bit-by-bit desensitise,
Before you’re known
for what you do,
you push the final button-
But I will get the better of you
this time, NO I’m not “self-destruct”-ing
I see through you
And I can face you,
All that love is gone,
All that “love” I had for you
was nothing but your siren song.
You almost had me
there for a minute,
but now the joke’s on you
I will not hand you
this soul to feed on,
I won’t give in to you.
I wait in the silence to hear my heart beat
again-
Now there’s the sound,
I take a deep breath, I open my eyes,
And then I look around.
Coward,
Just as I expected:
He’s nowhere to be found
